I wanted to tell you today the story of why I changed my name. So as some of you know, when I started SoulTour my name was Tara Nicole Nelson, it is now Tara-Nicholle Kirke.

And when I changed my name and started using my new name, I had a bunch of people email or call in to say, “Hey, did you get married, what happened?” And my standard line kind of became “No, I just got extra divorced.”

I got extra divorced. So Nelson was my second husband’s name.

And some time, maybe like four or five years ago. So you know, maybe six, seven years after we’d gotten divorced.

It’s just, the name Nelson started to feel like it was someone else’s name, like you’ve ever changed your hair and felt like you were looking in the mirror. And you were wearing someone else’s hair. That’s how I kind of started to feel about the name. All right.

So I have this very strong clear. If you’re into human design, I am a projector and I’m a splenic projector. So I get these very strong splenic like knowings. I just know what thing and I know it. And there’s a logic to it. It’s just right. So I had that strong, very clear, very resounding inner guidance that Nelson wasn’t going was not my name for the duration. But what I didn’t have was a similarly strong urge, or pool toward what would be my new name. And so I remember actually having a couple of conversations with clients or friends at the time, you’re like, I’m gonna change my name. I don’t know what to what, like, I’m going to wait till I feel that similarly strong knowing that x is my new name.

All right, so cut to maybe a year or two after that I’m teaching in the School of self mastery.

I’m teaching the book Cersei by Madeline Miller, which is all about the Greek goddess Cersei, who is the goddess of transformation? Well, let’s see, what what you think searcys descriptor is depends on who you be. All right. So for generations, she was known popularly as the dread goddess. And I don’t mean that she had dreadlocks, okay. She was dread because she had the power to transmit and used the power to transform people into animals. Men who tried to rape her into swine, for example, and say she was known as the dread Goddess, and Madeline Miller rewrote the story of surrogacy. And as I was teaching it, I came to super identify with it literally searcys life story and journey

was very, very parallel to my life story in Germany. Cersei was the daughter, one of many daughter

of Helios, the son of father was the son.

And her mother was kind of a minor,

A minor character in the Greek pantheon. And Cersei made some bad without knowing what her powers were used her powers in not great ways. When she was a teenager, and

was exiled, was actually exiled, had to leave her home, leave her family and go live on this island that was wild and uninhabited at the time.

That felt like my family, I had grown up with a father who was very genius and also very abusive, like searcys father

made some not so amazing decisions in my young adulthood, and then moved, you know, moved to realize that there was no way I could expand it to who I was becoming or even figure out who I was becoming while I was still having to live, receive the projections of what all of these people thought I was that who they thought I was. And again, just quick Human Design reference, I missed three five profile so that five line if you have it in your chart, it’s the week

Heritage line and traditional

human design, we I think of it as like the revolutionary line. It’s a line that receives a lot of other people’s projections, you might even feel if you have a five line in your chart, you might feel like people don’t really know you the real you, they just project upon you for good or evil. And so as you get older you be, you know, you may fix your magnet a little bit for people and fix your picker a little bit for people and you’ll fix your ability to with to understand and withstand other people’s projections. But as a young person, I was like, I don’t know, these people got a real strong point of view about who I be. And it’s not who I think I be. So I’m out. All right. So I moved at the time to Oakland. 25 years ago, I moved to from my small town hometown in the center of California, very red, very conservative, to Oakland and the Bay Area just few hours away, and just a few key light years way, spiritually and personality wise. And I moved here to go to law school at UC Berkeley, like when I graduated about 21 years ago.

So

what was interesting also, as a parallel is seriously moved to this island that was totally uninhabited. But while she was there, she started to learn and experiment with her powers. She started to experiment with her how she was designed and what she was called to do, what her unique gifts were. And she got really freakin good

at using those gifts. And along the way, the place that she created, the place that she transformed this uninhabited, wild, undesirable island into became the place that the whole pantheons wanted to be visiting people would show up, drop it and show up and drop in. Right, she came to raise a bunch of beautiful animals and a couple of beautiful children.

She eventually renegotiated demanded really of her father that she’d be on the exiled. And ultimately, she used her power to it to make this wild, radical Maverick decision for a goddess, she actually transformed herself from immortal to mortal, so that she could, you know, taste to the juice of mortal life that we all get to taste, which is the pain and the pleasure of knowing that this is fleeting. This is, you know, this, this physical apparatus is fleeting, though the soul is immortal. So we better go on a living spree while we’re here. Right? So I super related to searcys story Cersei in the original Greek was querque Kir Ke. That is why my last name is Nico Kirk. Although I just say Kirk, I don’t say querque.

So, process wise, when the pandemic happened, I became very aware, you know, I had I had lived through the Great Recession in I was in the real estate business during the Great Recession, I lost everything I had during the great recession 2008 I came out of it, we were we were like, I mean, my I was able to double my income, then double my income, then double my income again, with what I learned and how I became

who I became, as the result of the spiritual and practical rituals and practices I recreated in that incubator of recession, global crisis, that Bri lost everything. So when the pandemic happened, I was like, This feels really familiar. I’ve been here before I know how to do this, I know for sure, then this is relevant to every single human being watching this today. Whether you feel like you were super personally affected by the pandemic or not, because we’re already starting to see headlines about a coming recession. And I’m telling you guys, my big takeaway from 2008 was that there are those who will thrive in any global crisis, there are those who will thrive in any economic crisis. And not just those who take advantage there are those who thrive by contributing and finding their right spot in the marketplace.

Because they tend to their inner well being because they stay grounded and clear minded and on purpose, enough to know not necessarily to get their strategies in what they do in their decisions, right, that first go round but enough to be able to course correct to whatever the world throws their way. Right. So when the pandemic happened, I thought all right, every crisis is a portal. Every crisis is an opening. Maybe there’s some personal narrative here that’s ready, maybe what are the personal narratives that I’ve been living that are ready to be disrupted and it’s time

What is it? What transformations want to happen in the in in my life in this time that that, you know, quarantine and not being able to be as socially busy or as traveling busy as normal? What are the what’s the opportunity here? What wonderful thing what wonderful developments within me want to be had in the season. And so one thing I thought was, you know, in my life of as an entrepreneur and a toddler mom at the time, there’s not a lot of time for like the legal stuff.

So I thought anything will legal anything court be

my estate planning, I did a bunch of estate planning work. I’ve actually finished getting guardianship for London and adopted lens whole adoption process in the pandemic. And so in the same vein, I was like, you know, this is a good time to change my name.

So the way the process is supposed to go, he filed his name change paperwork with the court, you publish a notice in the newspaper. I know newspaper is still a thing. I think they mostly do it online. But it’s kind of like a gives everybody in town notice that this person is now becoming this person. Do you have any reason that shouldn’t happen?

Speak now or forever, hold your peace. Take notice. And then you’re supposed to go to this actual court hearing. And at the court hearing you have a conversation with the judge. And then the judge is like gavel you are now Tara-Nicholle Kirke? Well, because I filed my paperwork and did my newspaper notice in the pandemic, somehow my process was radically accelerated. And that somehow, I think, is the law of divine timing, which just says that when you are, especially when you’re in alignment with what you your unique sacred contracts are to do all this assistance and ease and acceleration or delays that benefit you begin to flow your way. So I filed the court for the court, I filed the court paperwork, I published the newspaper and notice.

I was waiting to hear when my Court appointment ones. And instead what happened was on my phone one day, I see a CSL call coming in Alameda County Superior Court, I answered the phone. And it was like hi, this is Judge so and so on the judge in Your Name Change Case, your order, you are officially now Tara-Nicholle Kirke. Bam, gaggle gavel you the court order is now done, I will email it to you, whatever you do, do not come to court. We are we did not want people in the building was like, Okay, so my name was officially changed in a very expedited way, so expedited that, in fact, I had to go to great lengths to actually integrate my name change into my own mind into my own, you know, it wasn’t like getting married, where you have this whole year of planning of the ceremony, and then the ceremony and then everybody’s calling you whoever, like it literally was like some guy call me. And then my name James. So it took me a long time to actually start using my new name. Hilariously, my friend Rebecca sent me flowers and was like here Tara-Nicholle Kirke. Like, she’s like, gotta remember that this is our right now.

And so, you know, that’s one principle to catch for some body out here, when you have been through a season of

intentional or unintentional but rapid transformation

that is expanded or changed who you be.

You may want to get intentional about integrating that, right? In our world. We do that sometimes in our school by metabolizing. The season before what happened this year, like at the end of the year, we’ll literally do an intentional manat metabolizing exercise what happened this year, that I want to keep us part of me like you, you need to no one’s really out. We are teaching people how to have an inner life and create an Inner Inner Inner infrastructure that is transformational. But this is how it’s done. You literally reflect pull in what you want to keep shed intentionally shed what you want to shed release what needs releasing. And often we do that by with in journaling or in writing or you know, in conversations, but writing has a specific power to it.

So I wanted to just share that in the self mastering method. Sometimes the biggest limiting factor that you have the thing that’s the point of the most resistance that stopping you from creating all this alignment that wants to happen in your life. All this alignment between the insides of who you be and the outsides of your life that wants to happen.

Sometimes the biggest limiting factor on that alignment is your identity.

It’s your identity. And sometimes it is the most sweeping

and easiest, the I shouldn’t say easiest, but it’s the most comprehensive to pool. Big lever that can trigger alignment. And the transformation you desire to have in your life is shifting your identity versus getting out here. What I see is a ton in my work is that people come in and they’re like, I have this thing I’d like to do or this way, I’d like to be this dream. I’d like to dream like to create, but I’m stuck or have no resistance or have these, you know, we call them all kinds of things in our logjams, procrastination, perfectionism, and they’re out here getting time management systems and accountability coaches and reading every self help book and trying to change the procrastination trying to. And I’m like, usually there is some, if you track it back, if you get out of trying to do the work of aligning the action of alignment, and you track it back to understanding who you really are, and what goals and desires and dreams you your inner wise and our being really has. Right? Or if you even track it back. Beyond deeper than that, under that.

And you get to the worldviews and paradigms and the belief systems, the laws of the universe, the way you see the universe and your role in it. What you believe is possible the trances and conditioning of fear and scarcity and unworthiness, if you get there is usually some central core trance or paradigm or belief, including identity,

that if you pull if you address that heal, that befriend that transform that everything else changes with so much more ease. And identity is one of the deepest, most core most central most effective by all those trances levers that you can pull. And I try I like to think of this as like identity shifts, including it which can be facilitated by or integrated by, or, you know, related to changing your actual legal name.

Change your legal name, change your spiritual name, change your identity, and everything else shifts and you get to be the boss of that. What this is is rebranding yourself to yourself rebrand. It’s a rebrand of yourself to yourself and just like a rebrand in business. There’s all this like other messaging and positioning, there’s a reason businesses rebrand, and all this money and take all this risk. It’s because they’re trying to expand or become something different. They want a different position in the minds of the market. Right? So rebrand yourself to yourself. The years ago, my students know the store years ago, like

I’m gonna say

30 years ago,

I lost like 60 pounds.

And

at the time,

I remember very clearly one of the big levers and people I remember people being like, how did you do and what did you do? i The one pivotal thing and yeah, I made all the changes because there’s like, I mean, they dramatically change the way that I ate, and how I move my body and who I hung around with stories I told.

But I’ve recall one of the big levers that changed everything for me and made all of those other changes very much less effortful. I remember listening to this Tony Robbins CD and I want to say it was called the power of your identity or the power of identity or something like that.

And I remember listening to this thing.

And I remember leaving listening to it being like, I’m just, I decide I choose now sovereignty over my identity. I decide now and I’m telling you, I was 16 I think I was like, let’s say actually let’s say it was 27 years ago, so maybe I was like 18 or 19 years old. Maybe I was 20

I remember saying today

209 pounds, right? Today

I’m a fit person, period. So from today on today, from today, I do what fit people do. And as I went about my day I tuned in in this hyper present way to everything to every the automatic choices I was making and the non on the intentional and habitual choices all

choices I was making as I moved through the day, I remember thinking like, a fit person wouldn’t read that.

What magazine would a fit person by? Right? What would I’m in the grocery store, okay, I’m gonna let my inner fit person, right kind of like my wise inner being my big self, I’m just gonna let my inner fit person do my grocery shopping, I’m gonna let my inner fit person choose who I spend my time with. I’m like that, and it changed everything. And it was much much much less effortful than trying to, you know, weigh food and track this and that it was just like a big, big shift at an identity level. And I continue when things when there are things that I desire to be different in my world, elevations that I desire to have in my world. I try to start them at identity level.

Some years ago, I decided that I wanted to be the mother of a thriving family of singing, dancing children.

All right, and that changed

the kinds of content I consume, the time I spend with my children, how I be with my children, who they get to be who else I’m allowing our lives. Right. When I started to study the sacred money archetypes I like leaned into I am ruler ruler is my number one archetype. Well, a ruler builds an transformational Empire for the benefit of all without swinging the hammer. Right. Same with learning my human design, I’m a projector, I’m an orchestrator, I am a guide, I’m not supposed to be doing all the work. And in fact, my

my work is actually in understanding my zone of genius, attracting in all the people I need around me and their zone of genius zones of genius, and getting really skillful and intentional about how I delegate, how I guide really more their work, because it’s not hierarchical like that, like I came to understand as at an identity level, who I be as a person that is a puzzle piece that fits with generators and mansions, right. Like, I need them, they need me. So we danced together, this is so learning how to orchestrate and lead that dance became a place that I started to spend a lot of my time, right, I started my identity shift, leaning surrendering to my projector, my ruler, my mother of a thriving family of singing, dancing children, it is a very powerful trigger of alignment in all of the other ways. And if you set it right, if you decide if you choose the identity that you choose to live into, right,

then you choose an identity that you’ve you’re in love with, that is aligned with who you’re wise and are being big self actually be who you can be the glory you came here to be.

You fall in love with that identity.

You let drop in and download in and fill in a very colorful, very nuanced, very vivid vision

for the life that aligns to and supports and is supported by that identity.

And then the feeling of the pressure than you need to pull all those fucking levers to change yourself or change your life

goes away.

Right? So only after I actually changed my name,

and was teaching I teach in Simon Sinek school, you might know him from a TED talk he gave some years ago that’s very iconic, called start start with why.

So only after I’ve changed my name, and I was teaching my my sessions in Simon school that I realized, wait a second. So my most popular I’ve written like 600 or something writing prompts over the last few years on my most popular prompt, the prompt that organizations hire me to come deliver in person to their conferences and rooms, their employees is all about name. It’s all about identity. Right? And it’s called What’s your game name? Now some of you will know it. But it’s basically a prompt that was inspired by the way that they introduced an heiress Targaryen and Game of Thrones with all of her descriptors, and how her name changes as she moves through the world and has different experiences, right and so the prompt is really about it challenges people to create their own Game of Thrones name, including the descriptors that they that would capture the essential qualities of the person that they’re in the process of becoming, versus the person they’ve been in the past or the person that their family says they are or whatever. So like if you could sum up who you are becoming without referencing your own limitations, your old traumas or even your current circumstances.

Who you are becoming? Right. That’s the game name prompt. And at the time when I wrote the prompt my original game name was this.

I would say I’m trying to call Nelson the inner critic coach, spiritual strategist to smart, successful people. Practice or a Buddhist detachment, lover of God and people and champagne.

daughter and granddaughter and mother and grandmother, founder of soul tour creator and teacher of spiritual strategy, which we now call self mastery method. The lighter and all things cashmere ambitious, uplifter, amateur athlete, amateur doctor, spiritual country and mother of pugs first of her name. Okay, so that was my original game name and I would ask people to give their original game names. But as I was teaching in cynic school, I was I had done this diagram where I’d broken it apart my now named Tara Nicole Kirk, and I had broken it into I had realized that I actually might three names are all mine. I have sacred namesakes for each of those names. Right My name Tara or Tara, others would say I pronounce it Tara

means star or tower or in gala mean star or light of the soul in Sanskrit. Right. And my sacred namesake is the Hindu goddess Tara, the mother of liberation.

Under Nicole, I always thought of like having a name St. Having my name is St. Louis St. Nicholas. But actually Nicholas was named after the Greek goddess Nike, the data of speed and strength and the messenger of victory to the people, y’all. All right. And then Kirk, and as I said before, and this is my sacred name, sake of my last name is the Greek DD querque, aka Cersei, the goddess of transform the formerly dreaded Goddess of transformation. All right, so liberation, my name is lit, liberation, victory to the people.

Trans transformation.

That’s my new, that’s my game name. Now. That’s the identity I now live into. That’s my upgrading. All right. So I’m telling you my self mastery stories in part, as a very long winded, luxurious, lavish, for me way of inviting you to this incredible event in real life in the flesh in the room, that I am running October 21, through 23rd in Berkeley, California, right here at the Clermont club and spa. It’s called upgrade your money and your life. It’s a place a sacred space in which you can begin to live that unlived formerly felt felt a little unreachable life that you were born to live. And I want you to know now that that live the life you will leave the room living on day three of UPGRADE is a life that is bigger and more delicious than your current identity can even contain, then your current imagination can even contain.

So stay tuned, there’s going to be a whole lot more about UPGRADE coming your way. I will drop the link to the early early bird registration into the comments here somewhere. One person who doesn’t early early bird registration will get a human design reading with me, which is a very rare thing you can’t actually get by it. I only do human design readings with my existing coaching clients remain existing empires of the soul clients and those investments started at $25,000. So I hope to see you in October. I love you.

And just think about what’s your game name? What’s the upgrade identity you’re ready to start looking into? I’ll see you in October.

Head up + heart out,

Tara-Nicholle Kirke, MA, Esq.
The Metaphysician
Founder + CEO of SoulTour

P.S.: In case you missed it, here’s the link to yesterday’s LIVE, when I told the story of how I used Spiritual Strategy to get an accurate medical diagnosis, after 15 years and 13 foot fractures. (Wheeeeeeeeew.)

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