Friends,
Listen to the AUDIO of today’s Transformation Tuesday newsletter, here.
Buddhists say there are only three ways to deal with an unwanted situation and stay sane. You can leave the situation. You can change the situation. Or you can accept every single thing about the situation.
Scan your world. Are there any situations in your life right now, no matter how big or small, that are taking up undue mental bandwidth or causing you unwanted stress. Anything you keep fixating on, fretting about or just spinning on.
Are you willing to leave this situation? We’ll talk more about how to know when the time is right to make a necessary ending in another email. (Till then, I strongly recommend this book. It changed my life.)
If not, can you change the situation? Not change another person’s behavior, but change the situation? Most often, I find that really translates to this question: Can you change the way you operate within this situation, or the way you look at it?
Or, finally, if you’re not going to leave the situation and you’re not going to change the situation, can you accept the situation? If you decide to stay in it, can you stop pushing against it inside your own mind and body andstop pushing against your feelings about it? Acknowledge that it is what it is, accept your own unwanted emotions in reaction to it, and then investigate the whole thing with curiosity and kindness (which, oh by the way, might lead you to make a change further down the line).
Can you do that?
Note: There are many other things you can do. You can accept 75% and push against the other 25%, like when you are in a situation, don’t like it, don’t leave it or change it, but then judge yourself for having the emotional reaction you are having to it.
Or you can stay in the situation, detest it at the core of your being and then spend all your time fixating about it, talking about it, or dreaming about how perfect your life will be when the situation resolves. . . someday.
You can do any and all of these things, and many more. But you can’t do them without paying a toll in terms of your inner peace.
Leave, change, accept or live in internal—and possibly eternal—unrest. Those are your options.
I’d love to hear how this one sits with you. Hit reply and let me know.
Head up + heart out,
TNN
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