Londyn is a Montessori kid so she loves to sweep. But she’s graduated to a penchant for vacuuming, and she wants to use the real one, not a toy. She’s also a Super Baby, so she can lift the vacuum out of the closet and move it around on her own.

I watched her do that the other day, and pretty instantly she moaned: “Ugh. It’s not working.”

I said, “I know, baby girl. We’ve got to plug it in.”

She said, “First, vacuum. Then plug it in.”

And I said, “Well, my love… the vacuum won’t work unless we plug it in first.”

Cut to: this morning, as I grabbed all of the things for Londyn’s day and my own, I made extra sure to grab my headphones… but somehow forgot my phone. 

Imagine my surprise when I got to the park to walk the dog and had the accessories I needed to listen to something energizing and inspirational… but I didn’t have the power source. 

Do you see where I’m going with this?

Do you see the moral of these stories?

You’ve probably had the experience of lying awake at night, stressing about what needs to get done the next day, then oozing out of bed with the thought: “I didn’t get enough sleep” or “I’m dreading this day” or “I’m dreading fighting with the kids to get them ready.”

And you’ve probably had the experience of getting right into the day before you’re really ready: getting breakfast on the table, kids to school or on Zoom, getting your own day of meetings or work going, but not feeling in the flow or like you’re even thinking clearly yet.

You might even have had the experience of going to great lengths to set aside time to work on your book or your business, but feeling blocked or stuck when that precious time arrives.

I’m hearing all of these fact patterns now more than maybe ever, especially among those who feel overextended or under-resourced (which is real common, these days)…that pervasive sense of “Ugh. I’m better than this. I want to do this. I want to do this well. This is not working.”

My advice is what I told Londyn and what I learned myself today: Don’t even try to play your A-game unless and until you plug in first.

Plug in first. 

Plug in to your power source.

Plug in to your Source.

Now if you don’t even know what ‘plugging in’ means for you, personally, then finding out what recharges and replenishes you is your #1 mission. Because not plugging in is a major limiting factor.

But chances are that you do know what gets you in the zone and on top of your game, and your Inner Critic is just telling you that you don’t have time or aren’t deserving of regularly doing it.

Maybe your “plug in” is a little earlier bedtime.

Maybe it’s a little more “me” time. Stretching. Taking a bath. Even at lunchtime. Whenever, man.

Maybe your ‘plug in’ is getting up before the circus begins and finding a quiet time and place to slow your thoughts down, even 10% or 20%, before you start the day.

Before you let other people into your space.

Maybe it’s making the decision to always always always take a 15 minute walk outside before you start work instead of plopping right down at the laptop, knowing that your plug in walk will undoubtedly multiply your creativity and focus far beyond what you’d get from 15 more minutes at the computer.

Maybe it’s working out or doing yoga at the beginning of the day.

Maybe it’s praying. Or free-writing. Or affirmations. Or pulling a card.

You do you, homie. 

I’m just asking you to do what you’ve gotta do to get yourself plugged into the energy you need — and the energy that runs this Universe — before you start putting demands on your system. 

Do whatever it takes to connect to Source.

Whatever it takes to open your heart. 

Cleanse your mind. Open a new compartment for this fresh, new day and let it be fresh and new.

Stop beating the drum of trying to control stuff you can’t control and ain’t never going to be able to control. 

Do whatever you’ve gotta do to drop your resistance to how the world works. 

Drop whatever grudge you’ve gotta drop about what so-and-so said yesterday. 

Drop whatever anticipation of the nonsense they might say today or tomorrow.

Write it down, burn that mess, do what you’ve gotta do to open your heart and plug yourself in.

And here’s the key: Do whatever you’ve gotta do to plug in before you start trying to be creative, generative or fruitful for the day… even if you’re a night owl. (And I have the utmost respect for night owls.)

There’s a viral idea in pop psychology on the Internet right now, something commentators on China’s specific burnout work culture call ‘bàofùxìng áoyè’: revenge bedtime procrastination. 

Journalist Daphne K Lee defined this as a phenomenon where “people who don’t have much control over their daytime life refuse to sleep early in order to regain some sense of freedom during late-night hours”. Gu Bing, a Shanghai marketing professional, says she rarely goes to bed before 2 am because, in her words, “I want to steal back my time.”

If you struggle with getting to bed on time, in enough time, to feel rested in the morning, you might ask yourself whether you’re retaliating against your perceived lack of control over your time and the choices you made about how to commit your time in a previous edition of yourself. 

If your answer is YES, then now is the time to reclaim your time. 

When you plug in first, when you pay yourself first with your time… it’s not about revenge at all. 

It’s lavish to pay yourself first with your time. It counters and contradicts the lies of your Inner Critic that say you aren’t worthy of your own time. 

It’s liberating and a tiny bit radical to give yourself your most rested time of day… to prioritize yourself and your energy ahead of every other person, place and obligation you have all day.

You’ll quickly find yourself resenting your life and your colleagues and your calendar and even your kids way less… because you paid yourself first.

You’ll feel the inner peace that comes from not wishing you could be on a walk when you’re in a meeting because you took your walk first.

So this is my PSA for the day, requesting and insisting that you plug yourself in first… and plug in well. 

Plug yourself in as frequently as you need to do without judging yourself for needing to plug in.

You don’t have to steal your own time. 

Reclaim your time. 

After all, it belongs to you.

Head up + heart out,

Tara-Nicholle Kirke, MA, Esq., The Inner Critic Coach™, is a Master Coach, author and the Founder of SoulTour’s School of Spiritual Strategy.

Tara-Nicholle Kirke, MA, Esq.
Founder + CEO of SoulTour

@taranicholle on FB | TW | IG | LI

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